Return to your mistress, and submit to her authority. Genesis 16:9

Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had not been able to bear children for him. But she had an Egyptian servant named Hagar.  So Sarai said to Abram, “The Lord has prevented me from having children. Go and sleep with my servant. Perhaps I can have children through her.” And Abram agreed with Sarai’s proposal.  So Sarai, Abram’s wife, took Hagar the Egyptian servant and gave her to Abram as a wife. (This happened ten years after Abram had settled in the land of Canaan.)

So Abram had sexual relations with Hagar, and she became pregnant. But when Hagar knew she was pregnant, she began to treat her mistress, Sarai, with contempt.  Then Sarai said to Abram, “This is all your fault! I put my servant into your arms, but now that she’s pregnant she treats me with contempt. The Lord will show who’s wrong—you or me!”

Abram replied, “Look, she is your servant, so deal with her as you see fit.” Then Sarai treated Hagar so harshly that she finally ran away.

The angel of the Lord found Hagar beside a spring of water in the wilderness, along the road to Shur.  The angel said to her, “Hagar, Sarai’s servant, where have you come from, and where are you going?”

“I’m running away from my mistress, Sarai,” she replied.

The angel of the Lord said to her, “Return to your mistress, and submit to her authority.”  Then he added, “I will give you more descendants than you can count.”

And the angel also said, “You are now pregnant and will give birth to a son. You are to name him Ishmael (which means ‘God hears’), for the Lord has heard your cry of distress.  This son of yours will be a wild man, as untamed as a wild donkey! He will raise his fist against everyone, and everyone will be against him. Yes, he will live in open hostility against all his relatives.”

Thereafter, Hagar used another name to refer to the Lord, who had spoken to her. She said, “You are the God who sees me.” She also said, “Have I truly seen the One who sees me?”  So that well was named Beer-lahai-roi (which means “well of the Living One who sees me”). It can still be found between Kadesh and Bered.

So Hagar gave Abram a son, and Abram named him Ishmael.  Abram was eighty-six years old when Ishmael was born.  Genesis 16

I am going to be completely transparent today, not because I want to show how honest I am, but to just simply get things out in the open and off of my chest.  But first, I want to type in all the notes and the profile on Hagar - there’s a lot so be ready.  I have been nudged all weekend to read her story and so far I have resisted, not because I was being willful, but because I knew that it was going to be an admonishment of sorts from God to me and I didn’t look forward to it.  I knew that it would be God telling me that the ‘only way to win the fight is to get back in the ring.’ 

Well, that should be enough of a teaser to get you through all the notes for today to find out what I’m talking about at the end…

Note on verses 1-3

Sarai gave Hagar to Abram as a substitute wife, a common practice of that time.  A married woman who could not have children was shamed by her peers and was often required to give a female servant to her husband in order to produce heirs.  The children born to the servant woman were considered the children of the wife.  Abram was acting in line with the custom of the day, but his action showed a lack of faith that God would fulfill his promise.

Note on verse 3

Sarai took matters into her own hands by giving Hagar to Abram.  Like Abram she had trouble believing God’s promise that was apparently directed specifically toward Abram and Sarai.  Out of this lack of faith came a series of problems.  This invariably happens when we take over for God, trying to make his promise come true through efforts that are not in line with his specific directions.  In this case, time was the greatest test of Abram and Sarai’s willingness to let God work in their lives.  Sometimes we too must simply wait.  When we ask God for something and have to wait, it is a temptation to take matters into our own hands and interfere with God’s plans.

Note on verse 5

Although Sarai arranged for Hagar to have a child by Abram, she later blamed Abram for the results.  It is often easier to strike out in frustration and accuse someone else than to admit an error and ask forgiveness.  (Adam and Eve did the same thing in 3:12, 13.)

Note on verse 6

Sarai was angry with Abram, but she took it out on Hagar, and her treatment was harsh enough to cause Hagar to run away.  Anger, especially when it arises from our own shortcomings, can be dangerous.

Note on verse 8

Hagar was running away from her mistress and her problem.  The angel of the Lord gave her this advice:  (1) to return and face Sarai, the cause of her problem, and (2) to submit to her.  Hagar needed to work on her attitude toward Sarai, no matter how justified it may have been.  Running away from our problems rarely solves them.  It is wise to return to our problems, face them squarely, accept God’s promise of help, correct our attitudes, and act as we should.

Note on verse 13

We have watched three people make serious mistakes:  (1) Sarai, who took matters into her own hands and gave her servant to Abram; (2) Abram, who went along with the plan but when circumstances began to go wrong, refused to help solve the problem; and (3) Hagar, who ran away from the problem.  In spite of this messy situation, God demonstrated his ability to work in all things for good (Romans 8:28).  Sarai and Abram still received the son they so desperately wanted, and God solved Hagar’s problem despite Abram’s refusal to get involved.  No problem is too complicated for God if you are willing to let him help you.

And finally, Hagar’s profile…

Escape of some kind is usually the most tempting solution to our problems.  In fact, it can become a habit.  Hagar was a person who used that approach.  When the going got tough, she usually got going – in the other direction. 

However, it is worthwhile to note that the biggest challenges Hagar faced were brought on by other people’s choices.  Sarah chose her to bear Abraham’s child, and Hagar probably had little to say in the matter.

It isn’t hard to understand how Hagar’s pregnancy caused her to look down on Sarah.  But that brought on hard feelings, and Sarah consequently punished Hagar.  This motivated her first escape.  When she returned to the family and gave birth to Ishmael, Sarah’s continued barrenness must have contributed to bitterness on both sides.

When Isaac was finally born, Sarah looked for any excuse to have Hagar and Ishmael sent away.  She found it when she caught Ishmael teasing Isaac.  In the wilderness, out of water and facing the death of her son, Hagar once again tried to escape.  She walked away so she wouldn’t have to watch her son die.  Once again, God graciously intervened.

Have you noticed how patiently God operates to make our escape attempts fail?  Have you begun to learn that escape is only a temporary solution?  God’s continual desire is for us to face our problems with his help.  We experience his help most clearly in and through conflicts and difficulties, not away from them.  Are there problems in your life for which you’ve been using the “Hagar solution”?  Choose one of those problems, ask for God’s help, and begin to face it today.

Strength and accomplishments

• Mother of Abraham’s first child, Ishmael, who became founder of the Arab nations

Weaknesses and mistakes

• When faced with problems, she tended to run away
• Her pregnancy brought out strong feelings of pride and arrogance

Lessons from her life

• God is faithful to his plan and promises, even when humans complicate the process
• God shows himself as one who knows us and wants to be known by us
• The New Testament uses Hagar as a symbol of those who would pursue favor with God by their own efforts, rather than by trusting in his mercy and forgiveness

Vital statistics

• Where:  Canaan and Egypt
• Occupation:  Servant, mother
• Relatives: Son: Ishmael

Key verse

“Then the angel of the Lord said, ‘Return to your mistress and submit to her authority’” (Genesis 16:9).

Hagar’s story is told in Genesis 16, 21.  She is also mentioned in Galations 4:24.

I know there were a lot of notes and the profile is always lengthy, but I really, really needed this today and at this time in my life and marriage – especially my marriage. 

I am confronted with the fact that my tendency is the “Hagar solution.”  After I graduated high school I went into a fairly sever depression that took years to ‘outgrow.’  I did go on to college, but I sort of ‘gave-up’ on life.  I just didn’t care to put a whole lot of effort into living.  A few months prior to graduating college and for a time thereafter, I had a burning desire to uproot and settle down wherever my car took me.  In many of my past relationships – friends and boyfriends alike – once I had had enough, then that was it, I would disengage in those relationships and staunchly refuse to re-engage. 

This is the stage I’m at now with my marriage.  I have found that there are no more tears, I don’t even care enough to cry - that in and of itself is bad news.  But, I have found that, though my habit is to pack up and leave, I can’t.  God is my priority.  God is first.  That said, as I was reading through this chapter and especially in the notes and the profile of Hagar, I simply had to laugh.  My God is an awesome God!   

Oh!  Where do I begin?  I made the decision to ‘remove myself from my present situation so that I could make an objective decision’ a couple of weeks ago.  My husband asked me to give him several days and for whatever reason, I gave him that and much more.  I hadn’t settled on whether I would stay married to him any longer, but I gave him his ‘last chance.’  This past weekend, nothing went wrong, nothing was so horrible that ‘I simply can’t take it anymore,’ nothing at all would cause a sane woman to leave her home and family, yet by Saturday, I had decided that was exactly what I was going to do Monday.  I know myself well enough to know that I haven’t been making decisions rationally and objectively, but have been wallowing in emotional decision making.  Those types of decisions aren’t altogether reliable, I’m sure that you would agree.  In any case, the Lord started ‘pestering’ me with the thought that I needed to read about Hagar on Friday, the day before I ultimately made my final decision… I love God, I’m writing this in humor, since you can’t see me smiling nor hear me laughing inside! – just in case you’re wondering. 

Anyway, just as Sarai took matters into her own hands, I, too, have tried to follow God’s guidance my way.  This obviously has compounded my problems.  Sure, I would have probably still had problems, but I sure didn’t help any.  And just like in note 3 above, my biggest test is willingness to simply wait on the Lord.

As in the note on verse 5, I, too, have made the mistake of acting out of frustration.  And though I have from time to time admitted to being wrong and the one to blame, how much easier it is so blame someone else, like my husband.

In the note on verse 8, Hagar was running away from her mistress and her problem, you could simply say that I was running away from my husband, marriage and problem…  And that would pretty much sum it up.  So, as the angel instructed Hagar to return to her mistress and face the cause of her problem and also to submit to her, so to, has the same voice through the scriptures – the Word of the Lord – said to me, return to your husband and face the cause of your problem and to submit to him.  Ugh!  So, I say to God, ‘Real funny Lord, but okay, and just so you know, I can’t do it of my own free will any more.  I have absolutely no desire to sacrifice my self any longer for that stubborn stiff necked man.‘  God just laughs at me.  I know He’s laughing at me right now, but at least I feel comfortable enough to tell Him how I really feel.  And why shouldn’t I, He already knows anyway…

In the note on verse 13, In spite of this messy situation, God demonstrated his ability to work in all things for good (Romans 8:28 ) and No problem is too complicated for God if you are willing to let him help you, I find it very comforting to know that God, no matter what all my shortcomings and downfalls, no matter how horribly I screw things up, can and will work in all things for my good.  It is a promise in His word and I can rely on that.  That doesn’t mean that I’m foolish enough to think that I will escape the consequences of whatever choices I’ve made or things that I’ve said, just that I have a comfort knowing that God will see me through.

The writer of Hagar’s profile asks this question, Have you noticed how patiently God operates to make our escape attempts fail? This simply is amusing to me especially when I think of my history and the pattern of escape that I tend to fall into…I would laugh hysterically if I didn’t think someone might think I’m a little off in the head because this is so true in my life…  And as the writer continues, God’s continual desire is for us to face our problems with his help.  We experience his help most clearly in and through conflicts and difficulties, not away from them. Ouch!  I need to remember that.  This concept is supported many times throughout the bible. 

Anyway, now you know my state of mind as of recently and now we all know, myself included, how far I must go to ‘get right’ with God.  At least I know this one thing, even though I can’t begin to imagine how this is all working together “for my good and not my destruction to give me a future and a hope,” (Jer 29:11) I can rest assured that God does know and that He is guiding me and allowing these things to be problems in my life for whatever length of time He deems necessary for my good and to give me a future and a hope.  So, I’ll end today on this bright note, not feeling at all able to live up to it, but I’ll keep reminding myself of this and by the end of this roller-coaster ride God will have a polished jewel in me for His efforts.  My emotional outlook is fairly dismal, but my rational mind really does believe what I have written today.  I must stay focused on the rational and not the emotional or I’ll get swallowed up…  Have a great day!

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.  Psalm 139:23-24

May God provide the increase.